Hmmm....feel silent again today !

I am always trying to relax my feeling no matter I am at work or home. But it seems not cut down all my sadness away from my brain. Evidently, today after work I, bro and Dad went to meet a Doctor (Oung Chakravuth)who is specialist in Stomach disease at his house as my Dad seems not fine in his stomach these days.Before Nurse called my Dad to meet Doctor, i ran to the Dr. to describe a bit about Dad's disease condition as i fear the Doctor may give some drugs that can be effected his health while he is having this monster disease! I walked quickly to Doctors'room when Nurse called Dad comes inside. I spoke to Doctor so fast that:" Doctor, my Dad has Lungs Cancer Stage IV with a letter that i wrote for him"Then Doctor replied:" So why come to meet me?" I said "because his stomach seems not fine these days". Doctor said:" Ok let he comes inside first!." Doctor asked my Dad about his health's condition and often looked at my sad face seems he knew what things he will ask and talk to my Dad. After finished asking, he gave some drugs for my Dad and opened the door for us. Dad said thank you to him and I also said thank too. At that time, doctor said to me : " Be strong!" and he looked at me with very sad face and very understandable about my feeling.I smiled to him with very soft voice: "Ja, OrKun Dr". Hmmm...I feel it seems reminding when I looked after Dad in hospital,Singapore, I often came first to talk and beg Doctor there not to say any serious words about his condition. Actually, this feeling is really hard to say as sooo hard..inside:(. I just know that I won't let my Dad hears any word about his real disease situation because I'm afraid that he can be shocked or fall down or can't even eat anything after hearing. It really makes my feeling not well but I am still happy to stay near my Dad when he meets any Doctor ! Every time I need to run to talk to doctor first before Dad meet them as I still fear if any doctor may confuse to say about his real condition out..,then there is a big trouble comes out!!! Well, I seem tired after work plus brought Dad to meet Doctor...I got very upset feeling now!! However, never mind ... as I seem feel exhausted now!! Yes will sleep early now!